Try as I might...

I honestly try each year to have a happy birthday.

I know that I have much to be happy about and grateful for: a wonderful life with a loving husband, a great family, excellent friends, meaningful and satisfying work, art and music, the cutest and most loving cats on the planet, a safe and comfortable home, reasonably good health, plenty of interesting things to keep me occupied.

I will do things on my birthday that bring me pleasure, like visit the zoo and a have a meal at one of my favorite restaurants. I will spend time making art and laughing with my husband. Perhaps he will play his guitar for me. It will be a good day, over all.

For the last 10 years, I have tried to be happy on my birthday, and a do manage to find some happiness, to be sure. But the day will always be bittersweet. From about the age of three, I began my birthday every year with the same ritual. Having been born on my mother's 38th birthday, I would look at her (or call her on the phone) almost as soon as I woke up and I would say, "Happy birthday, Mom."

"Happy birthday, baby," was her reply.

I have not heard those words in ten years, nor will I ever hear them again.

I wish I could say that I miss her a little less each year or that the ache dulls just a bit as time passes, but that would be untrue. 

So, I will try to be happy on my birthday, but if I'm a little blue, bear with with me.

Mom and her birthday "baby" -- letting my nerd flag fly

Art on My Door -- A daily practice

Art on My Door, a set on Flickr.

So, I'm one day away from reaching 365 tiny (2" x 3") pieces of art created for the small card frame on my office door.

It's important to note that it has taken almost exactly two years to get to this point, the art being made only for days when I came in to my office to work. That means weekends, vacations, telecommuting days, and sick days have made up half of the last two years of my life.

I started the practice nearly two years ago when a series of events combined to create a gigantic opening in my life for more art and more creativity. I had agreed to host a one-day exhibit of "Leaving Dakota," a photography project from the amazing Kyle Cassidy. I was also moving into a new office with two significant features, a large, empty white wall that made a lovely home for the exhibit, and a small brass business card-sized frame on the door that just I just couldn't bring myself to treat as something boring or mundane. Thus, Art on My Door was born.

Looking back over the collection, I am struck by the variety in my own work, born from my willingness to try new techniques and embrace new media. I love to mix things up, so collage and watercolor and even a couple of 3D projects feature prominently.

I'm also happy with the mix of abstract and representational art. I enjoy playing with lines, doodling and "taking a line for a walk" as Paul Klee described the act of drawing.

I don't think I'm going to stop making art now that I've reached this milestone.

In fact, I don't think I can. The act of making has become an integral part of my daily meditation practice, a way I center myself and find some joy even in the most stressful or depressing days.

Art is powerful. It can heal you. I know this to be true.

30-Day Art Challenge: Catching Up

It's been a busy weekend and I've been forgetting to post stuff I'm working on. Some of it is boring, like the inventory list for my upcoming show at Sky River Mead. I've also been taking a photo a day, like this one, using Instagram and cooking and baking because that's how I roll.

But the biggest project, by far, remains the pieces for the 30-Day Art Challenge. I've been busy preparing the canvas boards with the shredded text backgrounds. I'm using pages from a truly awful and terribly damaged old book, old copies of The Wall Street Journal, an old telephone directory, and a couple of remaindered textbooks --including one Chinese accounting book-- for the backgrounds. I'm using a simple solution of Elmer's Glue and water to adhere the paper to the canvas boards and drying them partially with a blow-dryer before leaning them against the studio window to dry thoroughly.

Now that I have a few of these prepped, I'm ready to start adding layers of color and texture  using a variety of techniques including stencils, hand-carved stamps and rollers, dry-brush & sponging.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

30-Day Art Challenge -- Day 4

Another layer of color



And the last element, some text.


First one done & I'm ready to rock the rest of the designs.|

30-Day Art Challenge -- Day 3

Adding some layers to the piece now.



Still taking it slowly as I discover what I like or don't like in the process.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

30-Day Art Challenge -- Day 2

I want to get this post started before it gets too late.

First two steps on canvas #1 for the 30-Day Art Challenge. I've glued down scraps of text torn from an old and irredeemable book called "The Infinite Woman," a fitting beginning for this piece. The figure is one of my favorite stencils. Next, comes some more color & texture, but I may have to leave it here tonight because I'm just flat-out tired.

I suspect weekends will be more productive days on this project.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

30-Day Art Challenge -- Day 1

I picked up my canvas boards today for the 30-Day Art Challenge coincidentally just in time for Traci Bunkers' latest 30-day art throwdown.

I have to admit that the stack of them is a little daunting, particularly as I am also making some new pieces for my upcoming show at Sky River Mead later this month. Still, I think I'm up to the challenge, I have a great concept for the set of 30 pieces, and I think I'll be able to do a great job carrying it off as long as I stay focused and make sure to do at least a little work on the canvases every day.

This is as far as I got with the actual art-making tonight. Ironically, when I tried to make this post from my phone, the App kept throwing an error, so I'm up late anyway, downloading pics to my laptop so I can upload them to this post.

Long day & I'm too tired to stay up making art. More time and energy for art tomorrow.